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THE 

FUTURE LADY HOLLAND 

311 Comclip in €|)ree %tt^ 



By HELEN P. KANE 

AUTHOR OF A BUNDLE OF MATCHES, THE WHITE DOVE OF ONEIDA, 

THE UPSETTING OF JABEZ STRONG, PEREGRINATIONS 

OF POLLY, ETC., ETC. 



Copyright, 191 i, by Dick & Fitzgerald 



«5w 



NEW YORK 

DICK & FITZGERALD 

18 ANN STREET 



i,^ 



$ 



^1 



TMPS6-C06386 
©CID '^4748 



Note. — The professional acting rights of this play are 
expressly reserved by the publishers, to whom theatrical 
managers, who wish to produce it, should apply. Amateur 
representation may be made without such application and 
without charge. 



THE FUTURE LADY HOLLAND. 



CHARACTERS. 

Lady Holland, The "Dowager" Stately and insular 

Diana Holland, her niece. .Horsey, slangy and warm-hearted 
Yvonne de la Valliere, her niece. Gay, tender and passionate 

HiGDEN, elderly maid Very correct 

Note. — Yvonne. — All her actions are light and gay. She 
speaks with a very slight French accent. 

Locality. — Near London, England. 

Time of Playing. — One and one-half hours. 



SYNOPSIS. 

Act I. — Parlor at Lady Holland's. Higden's idea on 
parlor maids and marriage in general. Lady Holland's 
insularism. Her plans for selecting Diana's husband. 
Yvonne's grief. Diana's return from her ride. She shocks 
Lady Holland. Her torn riding habit. Lester announces 
his approaching arrival, accompanied by Brent. Lady 
Holland informs Yvonne of what she wishes done. 

Act it. — Same as Act T. Next morning. The notes to 
Diana and Yvonne and what they contained. The meet of 
the hunt. The quarrel and make-up. Vixen cuts up capers 
and throws Lester. Diana to the rescue. 

Act III. — Same as Act I. Evening of the hunt ball. 
Higden and Stubbs overheard by Yvonne. The arranged 
meetings between Lester and Yvonne, and Brent and Diana 



4 The Futute I<ady Holland. 

did not occur. Yvonne learns why, through the disclosures 
of Lady Holland. Diana goes to the station and returns 
with Brent and the Bishop. 



COSTUMES. 

Lady Holland. Act I. — Elaborate morning dress. Act 
II. — Carriage dress. Act III. — Evening dress. 

Diana. Acts I and II. — Riding habit. Act III. — Even- 
ing dress. 

Yvonne. Act I. — Dainty morning dress. Act II. — Car- 
riage dress. Act III. — Evening dress. 

Higden. Maid's dress. Very severe. 



INCIDENTAL PROPERTIES. 

Cushions, embroidery frame and silks, hunting-crops, and 
whips, lot of torn riding habits, Burke's Peerage, horns, four 
letters, hats, glasses, decanters, pins, dark coat and light 
wraps. 



STAGE DIRECTIONS. 

As seen by a performer on the stage facing the audience. 
R. means right hand, l. left hand of stage, c, center, r. c, 
right, and L. c, left of center, l. 1 e. left first entrance 
(nearest footlights.) l. u. e. left upper entrance (furthest 
from footlights.) D. l. c. and D. r. c. doors in rear flat. 
R. 1 E. right first entrance. UP;, means towards rear of stage. 
Down, towards footlights 



THE FUTURE LADY HOLLAND. 



ACT I. 



SCENE. — Parlor of the Manor, d. l. c. in rear of flat, open- 
ing on terrace. D. R. c. in rear flat, with curtains. Fire- 
place L. c. Large easy-chair near it. Books, papers, 
lamp, etc. on table. Piano up r. embroidery frame and 
low work table near it. Low seat near d. l. c. another 
near fire-place. Several chairs massive and handsome. 
Couch near window R. c. Entrances up l. down l. and 
DOWN R. Telephone up r. DISCOVEKED Yvonne 
parting curtains D. r. c. 

Yvonne. Diana! (Sees Higden ENTEEING l. 1 e.) 
Oh ! Higden have you seen, Miss Diana ? 

Higden (looking critically at wraps she carries over her 
arm, and folding them). 'T'd be better sight than mine, 
Miss Eevan, could catch sight o' Miss Di! An' if 'er neck's 
not broke some fine mornin' 'twon't be 'er fault! (Sets 
chairs exactly straight, muttering as she does so) 'Ouse- 
maid's work never were in my line; but I'd like the trainin* 
of 'em ! 

Yvonne (dropping the curtains, and coming in laughing). 
What are you muttering about, Higden? The sun shines. 

Higden (severely). It do, Miss Eevan, an' the more it 
shines, the less they brasses do. (Rubs vigorously at the 
fender) I caught sight o' that shif'less Bess, but now, out in 
the lane wi' Sampson ; an' I'd a swore 'is arm was roimd 'er. 

Yvonne (mischievously). But that's improper, Higden. 

Higden (rising and folding her arms). You may well say 
that. Miss. I've small use for men, Miss Eevan. They're 
'andy for 'eavy weights; but when a girl sees too much of 
'em, she's boun' to marry. 

Yvonne (with mock serioitsness). And that is a calamity. 

Higden (seriously). Ah! — I've cause to know. I neai; 
married myself, once. Miss. 



6 The Future IVady Holland. 

Yvonne (with moch terror). Oh! Higden. What saved 
you? 

Higden {solemnly). 'E did. Miss. 'E ran away. 

Yvonne {relieved). Oh! What would have happened if 
he had not? 

Higden {gloomily). I'd a married, — sure as my name's 
Jane Higden ; an' the 'ouse'd been moithered wi' muddy boots, 
an' no end o' clutter, an' he might a gone to bed in 'is boots ! 
Don't talk to me o' marryin', Miss. 

Yvonne {laughing). What would we do if you did, 
Higden! You say Miss Diana is riding? {Bell rings out- 
side) 

Higden {going). Since early mornin', Miss, an' if she's 
brought 'ome in pieces, 'tain't my doin' ! [EXIT L. u. E. 

Yvonne {crosses to d. l. c. and steps out on terrace; holes 
up and down the road, shading her eyes with her hand, 
lingers a moment, her hand on the door, then ENTERS). 
Not one small glimpse of her. I hope she has found her 
dejeuner by the way. {Laughs merrily) She would more 
like to eat it on Stonehenge, than in the Hall, I think. 
{Crosses to piano and plays a hit of dance-music, then crosses 
to embroidery frame, draws out silks and begins working and 
then sings) 

Tic — toe — Tournez les jours. 
Tic — toe — J'ai de I'amour. 
(Air, " Chanson des Baisers " by Bemberg. Refrain) 

ENTER Lady Holland, l. u. e. followed by Higden with 
cushions. Yvonne springs up, draws the large chair for- 
ward, then stands with lightly folded hands beside her. 

Yvonne. A good day, to you, my Aunt! (Higden ar- 
ranges cushions) 

Lady Holland. Thank you, Yvonne; you have an odd 
way of saying " good-morning." Very un-English, like your 
song; it sounded blithe; but why couldn't you sing it in good 
honest English? There that will do, Higden. 

[EXIT Higden l. 1 e. 

Yvonne {laughing). I do not know. Aunt Sophie 

Lady H. {raising her hand). "Sophia," Child! Thank 
heaven, my people did not use French diminutives! (Takes 
up embroidery) 

Yvonne. Surely! You have told me that many times. 
My tongue will trip. I do not know how it would sound in 



The Future I^ady Holland. 7 

the English. It just sings itself, the sunshine is so bright. 
(Sings) 

Tic — toe — Roll on the days. 
Tic — toe — I have the love. 
(Stops, laughing merrily') You see, Aunt Sophia, it will not 
put itself into " good honest English." It is just the gay 
little chanson in the tick of the clock. 

Lady H. (severely). A little what? 

Yvonne (laughing again). I am so stupid. A little song. 
A thousand pardons, my aunt! (Kisses her hand playfully) 

Lady H. There, there, child! when will you out-grow 
these foreign ways? If it were not for your French father, 
I think I should be as fond of you as of Diana. (Yvonne 
starts forward impetuously) My poor cousin, what could 
have induced her to marry a Frenchman? 

Yvonne (interrupting passionately). Ah, Aunt! Aunt! 
If you had seen my father, so fine, so tender, so grand a 
Seigneur. 

Lady H. (tolerantly). Of course, Yvonne, I would not 
wish to destroy any childish impressions you may have of 
him; but the fact remains that he was a Frenchman; and 
every unprejudiced person knows that implies atheistical, 
and revolutionary. (Yvonne tries to speak, hut Lady H. 
raises her hand deprecatingly) You were too young, Yvonne, 
to realize it, but the French spend their whole time in 
pulling down church and state, and then singing the Mar- 
sellaise. Nothing could induce me to cross the channel, 
under any circumstances. 

Yvonne (demurely as she arranges Lady H.'s pillows more 
comfortahly). How then did you learn to know them so well, 
Aunt Sophia? (Note — She mal-es a little pause before 
"Sophia" as if about to use the forbidden form) 

Lady H. (scandalized). My dear, I have read history. 
From the days of my childhood, I have known that France 
rightfully belonged to US! If they had not foolishly re- 
belled, and that Mad Joan driven Henry VI from his right- 
ful throne, every Frenchman would have been an English- 
man; and we should have heard nothing of revolutions and 
communes and all the rest of it. (Settling herself in her 
pillows) You do make me so comfortable, child, Higdeu 
has been with me thirty years, but she could never learn 
your touch in fifty. 

Yvonne (demurely). That, I suppose, is my English in- 
heritance, Yes? 



8 The Future I^ady Holland. 

Lady H. (complacently). Certainly, my dear. No French- 
woman ever knew the meaning of comfort. I suppose there 
are some things in which the English Nation does not excel, 
but I have yet to discover them. Now, if you will bring your 
silks, Yvonne, and show me that stitch the sisters taught 
you, I intend to use it on this lectern scarf. I want it to 
be something original. (Yvonne crosses to tahouret and 
selects silk) I have just had a telegram, from Lester. He 
is coming home to-night; (Yvonne starts and drops her 
silks, then stoops to pick them up) and, my dear, I want 
you to make Diana look well. She hasn't your knack in 
dress, and she is so careless and I want Lester to appre- 
ciate the change in her for she really has improved amaz- 
ingly. {As Lady H. goes on talking, Yvonne stands with 
her hands tightly clasped, looking straight before her. Lady 
H. is intent on her suhject, and her embroidery, and does 
not see, or even think of he?-) I may as well tell you, child, 
I have always intended Lester to marry Diana. It would be 
eminently advantageous for both. Her mother was a Percy, 
and her grandmother a Vernon; both influential in the 
present co,binet. Most important for a young man just about 
to take his seat in the House. Then the estates would be 
kept in the family. Fortune hunters would besiege Miss 
Holland, if she were once brought out; and I propose to 
forestall them. She shall be presented as Lady Holland, 
and I will retire as the dowager. (Smiles complacently) 
I flatter myself that is very diplomatic and eminently suit- 
able. (Turns to Yvonne) What are you doing all this 
time, child? (Yvonne turns quickly and bends over the 
tabouret) 

Diana (outside). Down, Major! Down, Sir! No, you 
cannot come in. You needn't whine, you incorrigible beg- 
gar. Charge, Sir! and behave yourself. (Entering terrace 
door) Maje never can believe he's one too many anywhere! 
(She is in riding habit, splashed with mud, her hat hanging 
on her shoulders. She comes in noisily, crosses to chair R. c, 
giving Yvonne, who is crossing to Lady H. an affectionate, 
rather rough hug on the way, and sits on the arm, swinging 
one foot) Well, youngster. (To Yvonne) Had your 
beauty-sleep? Good-day, Aunt Sophia. I suppose it is 
still " good-morning," but I've been out so many hours I'd 
forgotten. Was up before five, 'pon honor! 

Lady H. Diana ! What a sight you are, I assure you it ia 
hardly ladylike to be so much in disorder. 



the Future I^ady Holland. 9 

Diana (laughing). And I assure you, Aunt Sophia, that 
Vixen is not in the least lady-like, and association with hei? 
is not calculated to improve one's personal appearance. 
(Whips her hoot with her crop) Such a time as I've had 
breaking the beast. But she's a beauty. And she will be 
worth it. I mean to ride her to the meet to-morrow. She's 
sure to be in at the finish, ahead of the field. (Yvonne has 
crossed to the terrace door, and stands looking out) 

Lady H. (severely). Even if she breaks your neck on the 
way. 

Diana (carelessly). She'd better not try it. I'd break hers 
first. I don't ride her without a curb yet a while, you bet. 

Lady H. Diana! 

Diana (laxighing). Beg pardon, Aunt Sophia, I forgot 
you don't like slang. (Throws herself into chair in loung- 
ing attitude) I'm about played out. We've been over the 
course round Stonehenge six times since daylight; and my 
lady was inclined to be frisky; but she came to understand 
pretty well that it doesn't do to play tricks with me! (To 
Yvonne) You'll ride to the meet to-morrow, won't you. 
Chicken? It'll be the biggest meet of the season — the whole 
county. You may have Lady, she's as sedate as Lady Hol- 
land herself. Named for you, wasn't she, aunt? Accounts 
for it, perhaps. (Yvonne comes in, talces off Di's hat, and 
arranges her hair. Diana looks up at her and pats her cheek 
affectionately) 

Lady H. (severely). Really, Diana. You are so much 
with horses and hostlers, you are in danger of forgetting the 
usages of society. 

Diana (carelessly). I'd like to. I've no use for them; 
and they bore me. Take a good horse and a race across 
country; now you hunted when you were young. Aunt 
Sophia, you know you did. 

Lady H. (mollified). Certainly. Every Englishwoman 
rides to the meet, if no more. But there are limits. 

Diana. You sat your horse well, I'll warrant. Old Saun- 
ders says Lady Holland on Black Bess, was the toast of the 
hunt dinner. You and I aren't in it with Aunt Sophia, 
Chickabiddee! (Puts her arm about Yvonne's waist) 

Yvonne (taking the hand on her hip, and smiling down 
at her). How could you think it, Diana? 

Diana (with mock pathos). Nobody ever toasted me yet. 
(Puts up one knee across the other, clasps her hands on it, 
and rocks) 



10 The Future I^ady Holland. 

Lady H. (shocJced). Diana, no lady ever crosses her knees. 

Diana. You see, you always used to tell me whatever 
Lester did was right; and he did cross his knees and he 
didn't toast me. He was more apt to roast me, when I 
didn't shoot straight. Now if I had been toasted, I might 
have been more like you, Aunt Sophia. 

Lady H. (not quite sure whether to he displeased or 
pleased). I will see that Lester supplies the toast and sets 
the example. 

Diana (very humbly). Thank you, aunt, but I'm afraid 
Le'8. won't count as an example. He'll do it, of course. 
You see he's bound to do it, if you tell him to. It won't 
mean anything! (Apparently depressed) 

Lady H. (with dignity). What Lord Holland does can 
never be without meaning. And I am pleased to say that I 
have never yet found my son regardless of my wishes. 

Diana (recovering from her depression, and laughing). 
Just wait until you pick out a wife for him! 

Lady H. (with augmented stateliness). Lester woiild cer- 
tainly not presume to question the wisdom of my choice. 
(Selects silks with care, matching them on her embroidery) 

Diana (jumping up). I believe you've done it. (Yvonne 
crosses quicJcly to D. L. c, and goes out on terrace) 

Lady H. (smiling mysteriously). And if I have? 

Diana. Great Scott! You don't really mean it. (Thrusts 
hands in the pochets of her riding coat) 

Lady H. Diana ! You are beyond all bounds. 

Diana. You really think he would ratify it? No matter 
who? 

Lady H. (rising). Certainly, if I know my son, he would 
trust me in so important matter. 

Diana (swinging over to piano). All right, Aunt Sophia; 
you may find out you need an introduction to Lester yet. 
(Plays a few bars of some popular air in a dashing style, 
then swings round again. Lady Holland is gathering up her 
silks) Do you mind confiding to me the name of the lady? 
I won't steal your thunder, 'pon honor. 

Lady H. (significantly, going out towards L. u. E.) I trust 
you may discover it for yourself, my dear child. (Turning 
hack) I expect Lester to-night. 

Diana (pleased). Do you? That's jolly fine. There's the 
hunt to-morrow; and there's a new litter in the kennels he'll 
be no end proud of. 

Lady H. (with dignity). Horses and dogs are well enough 



The Future I^ady Holland. H 

Jn their places, Diana, but I exi)ect my son to be interested 
in graver matters, now. A man just about to take his seat 
in the House, must establish himself as a man of family. 

[EXIT L. u. E. 

Diana (walks about, hands in her pocTcets, then picks up 
hunting-crop, holding it between both hands). Whew! 
S'prise party for Les. S'prise party for Lady Holland too, 
I shouldn't wonder. She's so cock-sure. But if I know 
Les. (ENTEE Higden l. u. e., crosses to Lady Holland's 
chair, and gathers wraps and embroidery) Higden, has my 
aunt been visiting much lately? 

Higden. My Lady's been leavin' cards on the county, Miss 
Di. An' we're to be uncommon gay while my Lord's at 
'ome, I 'ear. 

Diana. But has she been to any special place, frequently? 

Higden (stiffly). I can't say as she 'ave. Miss Di. an' if 
she 'ad, remarks on it 'd not become me. There's gossip 
enough in the servant's 'all, Miss Di. without me repeatin' 
it; but they do say as 'ow our young gentleman is comin' 
'ome for a weddin'. I'm not sayin' as they're right or wrong. 
Miss, an' I never repeats gossip under any circumstances. 
Miss Di. I wouldn't demean myself by such doin's ! (Starts 
toward h. u. E.) 

Diana (running after her). But Higden, tell me only one 
thing; this isn't gossip, and you're so sensible; and I won't 
tell a soul, honor bright; who do they say he's to marry? 
(Coaxingly) 

Higden (looking virtuous). I never repeats gossip, Misa 
Di., but cook, she do say as 'ow she believes it's my Lady 
Blanche, from Grenfels; an' the 'ouse-keeper she sticks to 
it, it's Miss Beatrix from the Grange; but Stubbs, 'e says 
'e knows 'tain't none o' these, but a stranger from Sussex, 
which ain't reasonable. Miss Di. I ain't for repeatin' any 
o' their gossip. Miss Di, but it Stan's to reason my Lord 
wouldn't wed out o' the county. An' they do say (Myster- 
iously) as the nearest is the dearest, (Pauses for effects, 
and is disappointed that Diana gives no sign of special 
understanding) but I makes it a point. Miss Di. not to re- 
peat the gossip in the servant's 'all; they've no call to talk 
o' their betters, I says ! [Tosses her head, and EXIT L. u. E. 

Diana (throwing herself into Lady Holland's chair, and 
laughing heartily). When I get the reports from the stables, 
my Lord will be fitted out for Constantinople. Did you hear 



la The Future I^ady Holland. 

her, Vonina? (Lools around) Where is she? (Calling) 
Yvonne. 

Yvonne (at d. l. c). Yes, Cherie. 

Diana. Did you know Lester is to be married? 

Yvonne (hesitating). I did hear something. (Coming in) 

Diana (catching her, and pulling her down beside her on 
couch). I'm just crazy to know. Who is it, Chick? Aunt 
Sophia has been hinting. She would deny that; she says 
hinting is ill-bred, and the servants are gossiping, and I 
haven't heard a thing but Vixen's whinny. ( Witli mode so- 
lemnity) Yvonne de la Valliere, from a social point of 
view I'm afraid I'm a dead failure, it's sad but true. 
(Yvonne laughs slightly, and touches Diana's cheek with 
her finger caressingly) You needn't laugh, it's serious. 

Yvonne (softly). Would Monsieur Lester think that? 

Diana. " Monsieur Lester." How long since ? You 
didn't say " Monsieur Lester " a year ago. Chick. 

Yvonne. A year ago I was a child. 

Diana (holding her off, and looking at her). Nonsense. 
Don't be a dear little goose, and hold him at arm's length 
because you're a year older. This isn't France and Lester's 
your cousin just as he is mine. 

Yvonne. Not just the same, Cherie, you are near; we 
are — oh, so far-away-cousins. (Picks up and examines 
Diana's crop) 

Diana. Oh, pshaw! Cousins are cousins. It's all one in 
the family. (Looks at her a hit anxiously) Lester's a good 
fellow, don't you like him? (Yvonne gives a sharp little 
cry, and drops the crop) What's the matter? (Picking up 
the crop) 

Yvonne (holding her hand). I scratched my hand. I am 
so silly when I am hurt. 

Diana (examining crop). I don't want it to tear my gaunt- 
let. 

Yvonne (quickly). Oh, it was not rough enough for that. 
You like your cousin Lester, Diana? 

Diana. You bet I do. He's not half bad. And you know 
we've been brought up together, fished together, hunted to- 
gether. He taught me all I know about a gun; don't know 
what I would have done without Les. 

Yvonne (with forced gaiety). And this is like home to 
you? 

Diana. Why, of course, Chickabidee, what you driving at? 



The Future I^ady Holland. 13 

This will always be home to me, I can't remember any 
other. 

Yvonne (laughing). You English are so funny. We say 
" chez moi " Well, you say "at my house," too; but when 
you say " Home," that is different. 

Diana (with emphasis). You bet it is, I just love this old 
place. And I know every man, and every horse, and every 
dog on it, and they know me. 

Yvonne (laughing excitedly, and crossing to piano, plays 
a few bars of Home, Sweet Home). That is the way it is 
with you, you English. And you are like the young mistress 
of the place. For me, it is different. (Plays a few bars of 
the Marsellaise, with fire) That is for me, and I love it! 
(Turns to Diana) Do you know what I shall do in the fair 
days that are coming, Diana? I am going back to La Belle 
France. It is safe to go now, even for a Valliere. The 
Bourbons, even, are permitted at their republican court. It 
is bright and gay there, (Speaks rapidly) and we French 
people love gaiety. I shall not go back to the old chateau; 
I do not love to look on blackened walls, that is not gay 
exactly. But I know such a pretty villa, where my father's 
daughter will be welcome, becavise she is his daughter. 
(Gaily) I shall be very happy there. And then, because 
there is nothing else for a French girl who does not marry 
bye and bye I shall go back to the convent. 

Diana (going over to her, and turning her face up to her, 
hand on her chin). What nonsense are you talking, Yvonne? 

Yvonne. I think it is very good sense. I shall not marry. 
I have made up my mind. 

Diana. Just wait until the man comes who will unmake 
it. But whether you marry or not, this is your home, my 
dear. (Seriously) 

Yvonne (lightly). I used to think it might be. But I 
am French, you know; I do not take root in English soil. 
(Springing up and hissing Diana, and speaking very gaily) 
Cherie, you need not look so solemn at me; I have thought 
it all out. It is the way for me. And you and Monsieur 
Lester will come to see me perhaps, when I take the veil. 

Diana. " Chacun a son gout." No convents in mine, 
please, Yvonne. (Holding her by the shoulders) You're 
just trying how much of this I'll swallow. You don't really 
mean it? 

Yvonne (laughing excitedly). If you were a French girl, 
you would know. 



14 The I^uture l,ady Holland. 

Diana (still holding her, puzzled). You can't doubt your 
welcome here and as for Lester, if he doesn't make good 
just let me know. He means well, but sometimes he has 
poor luck. 

Yvonne (looJcing suddenly at Diana's hahit). Will you 
lunch in your habit, Diana? 

Diana (inspecting it, and laughing). With all these 
splashes there'd be one in for me from aunt Sophia, sure. 
(Going towards d. r. c.) So long, dearie. Put convents out 
of that little head of yours; it's much too pretty to be shorn. 

[EXIT D. R. c. 

Yvonne (as Diana goes, ahandons her forced gaiety, 
drops her face in her hands, and shudders. After a 
pause, lifting a woeful face) I might have known it, I 
ought to have known it. But I thought he cared. (Pas- 
sionately) He did, he did care, and I could make him care 
more, (Fiercely) I will. I will have what is mine. 
(Changes her tone) But she has been good to me (Piti- 
fully) and Diana. (Sits hopelessly) I have no right to 
spoil the happiness of these. (Pauses, then again with pas- 
sion) No right, — I have the right. (Springs up and walks 
excitedly) He is all I have, he is the only one since my 
father went. They dare not take him from me. (Holding 
out her arms sohhing) Lester, Lester, you will not let them 
take you from me. (Drops her arms and stands perfectly 
still. Pause. Then in a low tone) Yvonne de la Valliere, 
you, you with the blood of the Vallieres to cry for that which 
has been given another. You must make him go from you. 
You Yvonne de la Valliere you cannot take from Diana the 
home that belongs to her. Home ! Ah, it is so different from 
" chez moi" — And so sweet. (Wailing) Oh, I cannot, I 
cannot. She cannot care as L She takes it as her dinner, 
as her morning ride. And to me it is life! And the con- 
vent, (Covers her face with her hands and shivers) how I 
hate it, its eternal prayers and fasts, its deadly monotony, 
how I hate it. (Pause) And if I forget everything, stay, 
and let him love me and he would, his mother would hate 
me. It would be discord, misery, and there is my father 
a Valliere. (Extends her arms, speaking breathlessly) 
Father, father, help me, help your Yvonne to go! (Drops 
slowly to her knees with upraised face and hands extended) 

Diana (outside). Yvonne. 

Yvonne (springing to her feet). Yes, Diana. 

Diana (coming to d. r. c). Oh, you are still here. I 



The Future X^ady Holland. 15 

thought you were in your room until I looked for you. 
(Diana is in negligee) 

Yvonne. I will come at once. (Goes toward D. R. c.) 

Diana. No, don't; I will come here. (Calling) Bring 
them all down into the hall, Higden. (ENTERS, followed 
by Higden, with armful of riding -hahits) You see, Nina, 
I've been so busy breaking Vixen, I haven't given a thought 
to my togs, and to-morrow's a big hunt, all the county. 
Now I think of it, that must be what brought Lester home. 
He's not the one to miss a county hunt, he's bound to get 
there, solid — with all four feet. (A hell rings outside) 

Higden. That's my Lady's bell. Miss Di. 

Diana. Throw them down, then, Higden, anywhere, you 
can take them back later. (Higden lays hahits on chair 
R. c. and EXITS l. u. e.) Now just look at these, and weep 
for me, Yvonne! (Takes shirt from the pile) Coat pretty 
good, but an awful rent in the skirt, caught leaping a quick- 
set hedge one day. Here's a whole skirt, arm torn out the 
coat, when she ran away with me. And this, and this, 
(Showing rents) and this. (Sits on low seat in mocTc de- 
spair, chin on hands) Not one whole habit among them. 
And it's too late to wire to town. After all, it's the way 
you ride, not the set of your habit; but I don't know what 
Aunt Sophia will say! 

Yvonne (quickly). Mine will fit you. 

Diana (whimsically). So will mine you. Well? 

Yvonne (eagerly). Wear mine. 

Diana. And you wear my rags. Oh, I say now, that's too 
m:uch. 

Yvonne (laughing). No, I wear no rags, I wear my own 
costume, but it is for the phaeton. 

Diana (aghast). And not ride with the hounds. I say 
Chick, I couldn't stand being so blooming mean as that! 

Yvonne. But I ride so little. I am hardly used to it 
yet; we rode so little in France and a big hunt like this, I 
am much better in the phaeton with Aunt Sophia. (Laughs 
merrily) Diana, you are so funny and you look serious. 

Diana. I am. Think I'm going to let you pay for my 
careless habits like that? (Angrily) What kind of a filly 
do you take me for anyway? 

Yvonne (gaily). The kind to he in at the finish. 

Diana. But 

Yvonne (interrupting). But, ma fille, you know I could 
not be! 



i6 Ofhe Future I^ady Holland. 

ENTER Lady Holland l. u. e. telegram in hand. 

Yvonne (quickly). Aunt Sophia, may I drive to the hunt 
in your phaeton? 

Lady H. (carelessly). Why surely, Yvonne, if you prefer 
it; it will not incommode me in the least. (Sees habits) 
Diana, what are these? 

Diana (with mock solemnity). Penitential rags. Behold 
the penitent. 

Lady H. Penitent, — I wish you would not talk such non- 
sense, Diana. What are you doing here? 

Diana. Asking for Charity. Got it, too. Scripture 
measure. And I feel like the Oppressor of the Poor. 

Lady H. May I ask, Diana, that you express yourself in. 
terms which can be understood? Are these yours? (In- 
dicating habits) 

Diana. Sorry, aunt; but I cannot disown my own! 

Lady H. (calling). Higden! (ENTER Higden, l. u. e.) 
Take these things to Miss Diana's room. 

Higden (gathering up habits). Yes, my lady. 

[EXIT D. R. c. 

Lady H. I came to tell you, I have a wire from Lester. 
He caught an early train, and will be here for luncheon. I 
would like to see you well gowned, Diana. 

Diana (rising leisurely). The dear old boy. Is he coming 
down alone? 

Lady H. No, that is one reason why he wired again; 
Stacy Brent comes with him for the week end. 

Diana (starting up). Stacy Brent! Oh, Aunt Sophia, do 
let me have Higden. (Excitedly running toward the D. r. c, 
then returning) I'm a sight, and I don't know where to 
find a thing I want! 

Lady H. (placidly). I am sorry, Diana; but I need Hig- 
den myself. Why did you dismiss your own maid ? 

Diana (despairingly). Oh, she was one too many for me, 
I couldn't put up with her, I did mean to find another, meant 
to ask the housekeeper to get one, but I haven't thought of 
a thing but Vixen for a month. And now 

Yvonne (laughing). And now, Cherie, you will have to 
" put up " with me ; I am very sorry for you, Diana, I may 
be " one too many " for you, too. 

Diana (laughing, and putting her arms about Yvonne's 
shoulders). You're a Cherub. Come on then. (Starts to- 
Viard D. R. c. with Yvonne) 



The Future IVady Holland. 17 

Lady H. Yvonne. (Yvonne turns) Go on, Diana; I 
have a word to say to Yvonne. (Yvonne comes down front, 
and Diana goes on, looking back and laughing as she goes) 

Diana. Don't keep her long, Aunt Sophia. — I need a lot 
done! 

Lady H. (sedately). You should have thought of that be- 
fore. [EXIT Diana d. r. c. 

Lady H. (putting her hand on Yvonne's shoulder, and 
speaking confidentially). Yvonne, you will remember vphat 
I said this morning of my hopes for Lester? 

Yvonne (smiling bravely). Yes, Aunt Sophia; I remem- 
ber. It was so well planned. 

Lady H. (complacently). I was sure you would find it so. 
I am a little disturbed over the coming of this Stacey Brent, 
when I wanted to throw Lester and Diana together without 
interruption. He may be in the way. (Looks at Yvonne 
questioningly) 

Yvonne (folding her hands lightly). Yes, Aunt Sophia? 

Lady H. Quite aside from my plans, he is no sort of 
match for Diana. 

Yvonne (demurely). He does not ride, perhaps? 

Lady H. (looking at her doubtfully). I thought you 
would understand, Yvonne; the French are not unlike the 
English in this matter. He is the younger son of a peer 
whose estate has gone to rack and ruin. You understand, 
out of the question for Miss Holland. Impossible, in fact. 
And I look to you to take charge of him, and keep him out 
of the way! 

Yvonne (demurely). And if he falls in love with me. 
Aunt Sophia? 

Lady H. (approvingly). A very good arrangement. He 
would convert your French estates into good coin of the 
realm, and rebuild Greytowers. I really think you could 
not do better, my child. Now see that Diana looks pretty 
for Lester, and keep Mr. Brent out of the way. I rely on 
you for managing everything as it should be. 

[EXIT L. u. E. 

Yvonne (stands a moment where Lady Holland left her; 
then crosses to the fire-place, rests her arms on the mantel, 
and studies her face in the glass. Pause. Then in a low, 
questioning tone). Make Diana pretty for Lester, (Pause 
again) and keep Monsieur Brent out of the way. (Pause 
again) And after that, (Looks long at her face in the glass, 
then turns and goes slowly toward the d. r. c.) 



id The Future I^ady Holland. 

ENTER HiGDEN hastily l. u. e. with "booh. 

HiGDEN. Miss Eevan, would you wait a moment, please, 
it's a message from my Lady. 

Yvonne {turning hach). Does she want me, Higden? 

HiGDEN {much hurried). No, Miss, she told me to tell you 
this might 'elp on with what you 'ave to do. {Gives booh) 

[EXIT L. u. E. 

Yvonne {opening booTc) "Burke's Peerage." {Laughs 
hysterically) 

Diana {from without). Yvonne, what are you laughing 
at? I need such a jolly lot of grooming. 

Yvonne. Nothing. I am coming, Diana. {Qoes towards 

D. R. C.) 

CURTAIN. 



ACT XL 

SCENE. — The same. Time. — The next morning. 

ENTER Higden l. 1 e. a note in her hand, crosses stage, 
and EXIT through D. L. c. After a moment RE-EN- 
TERS, and looJcs out on terrace, comes hacJc, and looks 
from window R. 

Higden. There, I might a known she'd be at the kennels ! 

[EXIT hastily r. 1 e. 

ENTER presently, Diana, r. 1 e. reading note. 

Diana. Dear old boy. But he's a chump all the same; 
too polite for his own good. {Beads) " Couldn't get even 
a chance word with you. That little French thing stuck to 
me the whole evening. Thought I might have been per- 
mitted to take you in to dinner; but when your hostess 
does you the honor, what can you do, but the heavy polite ? " 
{Laughs delightedly) Didn't I see it, old chap? It was 
rich. Don't know what got into Yvonne. She certainly 
did make eyes at him. Where's her convent training? You 
don't suppose Stacy can have burst the convent bubble in 
one evening. {Sits on arm of chair, thoughtfully frowning, 
and tapping the folded note against her lips) And Lester 
looked black, and went off in the den, and sulked. I won- 



The Future Xady !Qolland. I^ 

der — (Reads again) " You can't get away from me in 
the field," Hm! you don't know Vixen, Stacy, boy. I'll 
get my innings this morning, if I couldn't last night." 
(Folds the note and tuchs it into her vest) That remains 
to be seen, Mr. Brent. You're a jolly bit too sure. I think 
I'll ride with Lester. "When you take all the evening with 
one girl, you can't expect another to take what's left of 
your powers of entertaining the next morning. (Laughs) 
It won't do you any harm to be set down a peg or two, 
Stacy. Vixen can run away from your mount any day. 
She may give you a scare: but she won't me. (Starting) 
I haven't looked to her girths yet. Time I had! 

[EXIT quicUy r, 1 e. 

ENTER Yvonne d. l. c. reading note as she walks. 

Yvonne (smiling happily) . He is in a rage, my Lord Les- 
ter. (Reads) " If you have eyes and ears for no one but 
Stacy Brent, I naturally do not propose to interfere. There 
will be no possibility of seeing you during the hunt, as I un- 
derstand you drive with my mother. Why, I cannot imagine. 
But this evening, unless you are too much absorbed in Mr. 
Brent, you may be able to find a quarter of an hour for 
me." Un mauvais quart d'heure, Lester, for me. (Sighs) 
I shall avoid it, if I can, mon ami. (Sits on piano stool) 
And for Monsieur Brent I have not so easy a time with 
him, either. He is very distrait. It is difficult to find what 
he cares to talk about. And I did not have time to study 
the " Peerage." (Horn sounds off stage. Yvonne springs 
up, looks from window R.) That is the Grenfels party! 
(Runs out on terrace and waves her scarf; as she RE-EN- 
TERS, she meets Diana, coming in n. 1 e.) They are be- 
ginning to come, Diana. Grenfels is the first. 

Diana (looking from window). Lady Blanche there? 
Hm! Well mounted, too. That's a proper filly of hers; and 
she sits well. Strikes me Lester's air is rather devoted. 
If she is The One, Aunt Sophia may have smooth sailing 
after all. What do you think, Yvonne? 

Yvonne (blankly). What do I think? 

Diana. About Lady Blanche and Lester. Think that's a 
go? 

Yvonne (coldly). I am not a confidante of the Lady 
Blanche. I have not the pleasure of her long acquaintance! 

Diana (also coldly). It hardly seems to require long ac- 
quaintauce in some cases. 



20 The Future I^ady Holland. 

Yvonne (thoughtfully). I suppose it is a question of 
afl&nity. 

Diana (sharply). It looked that way. 

Yvonne (puzzled). Diana, I do not comprehend. 

Diana (crossing to table, and throwing about papers). 
You appeared to, remarkably, considering the length of your 
acquaintance ! 

Yvonne (more puzzled). My acquaintance? 

Diana (growing angry). A single evening is not usually 
regarded as a long one. 

Yvonne (beginning to understand). Oh, and you think — 

Diana (tersely). That for a convent-bred girl you were 
somewhat rapid, not to say " fast." 

Yvonne (distressed). But, Diana, Cherie, I had reasons. 

Diana (very angrily). Apparently. 

Yvonne. I wanted to make Monsieur Brent like me, a 
little. 

Diana (drily). He could hardly mistake that, it was too 
jolly plain. 

Yvonne. Diana, listen, you do not understand 

Diana. He did. Which ought to fill the bill. 

Yvonne (coming to her coaxingly). It was just pour pas- 
sez le temps. 

Diana. On the road to the convent — an amusement by 
the way. I suppose that is good form in France, but it's rot- 
ten bad form in England. (By this time Diana has worked 
herself into a rage, while Yvonne, as Diana becomes utterly 
unreasonable, sees the absurdity of it, and begins to tease her. 
During this scene the horns sound at intervals) 

Yvonne (demurely). He did not seem troubled, and he is 
English. 

Diana. Perhaps you think he approved. (Walking about, 
and striking her crop on her hand) 

Yvonne (coquettishly) . I think he did not (Zw-approve. 

Diana (bending her crop till it snaps, and throwing the 
pieces from her). How far did you go when you went out 
on the terrace? (Sharply) 

Yvonne (smiling shyly). Only to the east end. 

Diana. It took a long time to go so far. 

Yvonne (with great simplicity). The moon was rising and 
it was very pleasant there. 

Diana (ironically). And doubtless, so were you. 

Yvonne (merrily). Why not? The other was. And wfcy 
should you care, Cherie? 



The Future I^ady Holland. n 

Diana (furiously). I shouldn't. And I don't. 

Yvonne (demurely). You are troubled then for the honor 
of the house? 

Diana (savagely). As I said, it was rotten bad form. 

Yvonne (very sweetly). It had the approval of the head of 
the house. 

Diana. What! 

Yvonne (demurely). I was acting under instructions, 
Cherie, I had orders to keep Mr. Brent out of the way. 

Diana. Out of the way ! Whose way ? 

Yvonne (mischievously). Yours. 

Diana. Mine ! 

Yvonne (explaining from the piano stool). You see he is 
not a desirable parti; and it was better to keep him at a 
distance. 

Diana (sitting on low seat, elbow on hnee, and chin on 
hand). Hm! 

Yvonne (coming over to her, bending over her, and speaJc- 
ing remorsefully) . And I did not know you cared. 

Diana (brusquely). I didn't say I did! 

Yvonne (demurely) . Ah, well, if you do not, it is all the 
same. It would be more pity then, for him — as you English 
say — to fall in love with you. Besides, I have been advised 
to marry him, for the benefit of the English Peerage. I 
am considering it. Would you advise it, Diana? 

Diana (looks at her a moment, then begins to laugh). You 
little imp. (Yvonne holes at her for a moment with moch 
gravity, then laughs with her, and both laugh again and 
again. Suddenly Yvonne catches Diana about the waist, 
and waltzes with her about the room until they stop breath- 
less and laughing, then she dances over to the piano, and 
plays the first bars of the Wedding March) 

Yvonne. Does it sound well, Cherie? 

Diana (with mock seriousness). I have heard it before. 
Is it convent music? 

Yvonne (demurely). I have heard it in church. 

Diana (coming over to her). Honor bright, now, Chick, 
wasn't that convent talk all a fake? 

Yvonne (springing up and getting the broken pieces of the 
crop). I am so sorry I made you break your crop, Cherie. 
But it was so funny to me, your rage. 

Diana. Over nothing and I'm not gloating over myself 
just now. 



aa The Future I^ady Holland. 

Yvonne. So you call Stacy Brent " Nothing " ? 

Diana. He doesn't. And he called you "That little 
French thing." 

Yvonne. Oh! After all my difficulties to entertain him. 

Diana. And he needs a lesson. Will you help? 

Yvonne {considering). I taught the little girls once in 
the convent. 

Diana. If you will just go on "entertaining" him for 
to-day ? 

Yvonne. But he rides with you. He told me so last 
night. 

Diana. He did. He reckoned without his host. I ride 
with Lester. And I ride Vixen. His roan can't overtake her. 

Yvonne. And I am driving. 

Diana. He must escort the phaeton. I'll give Aunt 
Sophia points on that right now. {Going towards L. u. E.) 

Yvonne {calling after her). Diana. It is only for the day, 
I have an engagement for the evening. 

Diana. All right! I'll make a date with him for the 
evening just to rub it in a little. [EXIT l. u. e. 

Yvonne {goes again to the piano, and softly plays the 
Wedding March over. Laughing happily). So it is Mon- 
sieur Brent. And she does not want her cousin Lester. 
{Dolefully) That will be very sad for Aunt Sophie, who 
had so well arranged everything. And Mr. Brent is the 
younger son of an impoverished peer and impossible. I 
forgot to tell Diana that he was " impossible " {Laughs 
joyously) It ought to influence her. And all Aunt Sophie's 
plans. Ah, Aunt Sophie will never know how French she is. 
That is just the way they manage things chez nous. But 
Diana, she is English altogether and the impossible does 
not exist for her. And my " mauvais quart d'heure." It does 
not look so bad after all. But Aunt Sophie; it may perhaps 
be a bad quarter of an hour for her. Some surprises are 
very trying, and I think Aunt Sophie is not prepared for 
surprises. Lester too is very English, and he was very angry 
when he wrote this note. {TaJces note from her dress, and 
reads smiling) " Unless you are too much absorbed by Mr. 
Brent." His anger gives me much comfort. {Laughs softly) 
I think if Aunt Sophie is not too indignant, I will not go 
back to the convent. {Kisses the note and replaces it in her 
dress) But what will Aunt Sophie say {Turns to piano and 
touches chords) 



the Future I<ady Holland. 23 

ENTER hurriedly Higden r. 1 e. 

HiGDEX. Miss Eevan, wherever can I find Miss Di.? 
The grooms wants 'er quick. Vixen's doin' credit to 'er 
name, an' there's nobody but Miss Di. can 'andle 'er. 

Yvonne. She went to find Lady Holland, Higden. In her 
rooms, I think. 

Higden (going towards l. u. e. and meeting Diana coming 
in). They wants you at the stables, quick. Miss Di. Vixen's 
misbehavin' most scand'lus. 

Diana. What's happened ? She was good as a kitten when 
I left her. TEXIT running R. 1 e. 

Higden. You see. Miss Eevan, the gentlemen got about 
'er, lookin' at 'er, an' praisin' 'er, an' she standin' gentle as 
a lamb, an' Mr. Brent 'e says as 'ow 'e'd like to try 'er paces, 
an' Mr. Lester — my Lord, I would say, you'll excuse it. Miss, 
but when 'e's been " Mr. Lester " for a matter of nigh 
twenty-five year, it's 'ard sometimes to remember " my 
Lord." 

Yvonne. That is easily understood, Higden. So Mr. 
Brent tried Vixen and found her difficult? 

Higden. No, Miss, Mr. Lester, 'e says, " She seems quiet 
enough," 'e says, " but there's a glint in 'er eye," 'e says, 
" an' if any neck's broke, it's goin' to be mine, an' not 
yours." (Yvonne becomes intensely interested) An' 'e says, 
" let 'er go, Saunders," an' 'e puts 'is foot in the stirrup, 
an' before 'e can throw 'is leg over 'er back, off goes Vixen 
like a shot, an' 'im a 'oldin' to the crupper, an' only one foot 
in the stirrup. (Yvonne leans forward breathing fast) 
Well, Miss 'c gets into the saddle some'ow, an' 'e puts on 
the curb, an' that makes Vixen jes' tearin mad, an' she gets 
up on 'er 'ind feet, an' she gets up on 'er fore feet, an' when 
she can't shake 'im off that way, she bolts for the five-barred 
gate, an' she goes over. 

Yvonne {intensely excited). Mon Dieu! 

Higden. Not as a five-barred gate would phase Mr. Lester, 
Miss, an' she takes it like a bird, an' she's off on the other 
side, an' him a stickin' to the saddle, with only one stirrup, 
an' 'e'd a come back safe, but of a sudden she stops short, 
an' begins to dance, an' then, before anyone could think it, 
she rolls. 

Yvonne {putting her hands over her eyes with a sharp little 
cry) . Ah ! 

Higden. 'E wasn't 'urt. Miss, don't be scart. 'E 'ad 'is 



24 Tlie Future IVady Holland. 

foot out the stirrup, an', flung clear of 'er before she was 
down, an' Vixen, 'avin' got rid of 'im, gets up on 'er feet, 
an' jes' stands there, a-lookin' wicked. {Bell rings outside, 
hut neither notices it) 

Yvonne. You're sure he's not hurt, Higden? 

HiGDEN. Not a bit of it, Miss Eevan. Sound as a nut. 
But Vixen won't let 'em touch 'er. The minute a man comes 
nigh, she ups with 'er 'ead, an' is off before 'e can touch the 
bridle. So they sends for Miss Di. 

Yvonne. But if she is so ugly? (Bells rings again, hut 
Higden is ahsorhed and does not hear) 

Higden. Bless your 'art, Miss Eevan, dear, don't you 
worry, Miss Di's equal to a dozen of 'er. Why, if you'd a 
seen 'er, three year old she were when she first rid 'er little 
pony alone an' Master Lester a-runnin' along-side, an' she 
flicks it with the whip, an' Master Lester calls out, " You 
quit that, Di.", an' puts up 'is 'and for the bridle, an' what 
does she do, but flicks Master Lester. She do indeed, Miss, 
an' away she goes. An' I've seen 'em many's the time 

ENTER Lady H. l. 1 e. 

Lady H. (severely). Higden, I have rung twice for you. 
Twice. 

Higden. Beg pardon, my lady, I don't know 'ow it could a 
'appened; I don't, indeed; but I didn't 'ear it. 

Yvonne (quickly). It was my fault. Aunt Sophia! I 
kept her, I was concerned to know if Lester was hurt. 

Lady H. (startled from her usual dignity). Lester! Hurt! 

Higden. It was Vixen, beggin' your pardon, my lady, she 
threw 'im. (Lady H. starts down r. much disturbed) 

Yvonne (following her quicMy). But she did not hurt 
him. Don't be troubled. Aunt Sophia. He only got a dusty 
coat (Laughs nervously) and then sent for Di. 

Lady H. (relapsing into her usual calm). Oh! I really 
was not troubled, child. Lester is too good a horseman; and 
Diana can manage Vixen. Higden, you may go get out my 
driving wraps; and my gloves and veil. 

Higden. Yes, my lady. [EXIT L. u. e.. 

Lady H. It is well they both like horses; they will im- 
prove the stud. (Complacently) It is really providential. 
And that reminds me, Yvonne, I was very much pleased 
with your attention to my wishes, last night. (Sits in chair 
L. Yvonne crosses to window R. and looks out) You are 
listening, Yvonne? 



The Future I^ady Holland. jJ5 

Yvonne {turning) . Yes, Aunt Sophia, but I was watching 
Di. coax Vixen. She is following Di. about the paddock 
with her nose on her shoulder, and the whole hunt is 
watching. 

Lady H. {reprovingly). I was about to say, if you can 
give me your attention — that you really couldn't have done 
better. I think you quite made an impression on Mr. Brent, 
and I have invited him to escort the phaeton, 

Yvonne. Oh, aunt, he will lose the hunt! 

Lady H. Not at all, my dear, not at all. It is only until 
the view-halloo. They leave the phaeton then. It is my 
pleasure, as hostess, to give him the pleasure of riding be- 
side you; and I hope it may be reciprocal. 

Yvonne {with a little excited cry). Oh! Aunt Sophia 
come, come and look, Di. is on Vixen, and they are all 
cheering. {Sound of cheering off stage). Hear them, every 
hat is off. {Salute of horns off stage) Oh, but listen, Di. 
will be the toast of this hunt dinner! 

Lady H. {crosses to window with dignity and watches 
complacently) . That is quite as it should be. 

Yvonne {excited). There comes Lester on Ronald. 
{Horns again) They are saluting them both ! 

Lady H. {approvingly) . Quite as it should be — quite. 

Yvonne. Di. sees you. She is telling Lester. What a 
grand bow. He is showing the others, they all see you. 
{Cheers and horns outside) That was for Lady Holland! 

Lady H. {with a stately courtesy toward the window, then 
waving her hand). That is also as it should be — quite. 

ENTER Higden d. l. c. 

Higden. They've called the hunt, my Lady ; and Saunders 
is waiting with the phaeton. {Helps Lady H. adjust hat, 
wraps, etc., while Yvonne puts on hat and gloves, and 
throws a wrap over her arm) 

Lady H. What has Saunders put in the phaeton. The 



grays 



Higden. Yes, my Lady. 

Lady H. Is Mr. Brent waiting? 

Higden. Yes, my Lady, he and Mr. Lester both — my 
Lord, I would say — They're both waitin' to 'and you in. 

Lady H. Very well, say I will be down immediately. 
(EXIT Higden d. l. c.) You certainly have produced an 
impression, Yvonne. [EXIT with Yvonne d. l. c. 

CURTAIN. 



26 The Future I^ady Holland. 



ACT III. 

SCENE. — The same. Time, evening after the hunt. Room, 
in confusion. Hats, whips, and crops scattered on chairs, 
tables and floor. Decanters and glasses on table L. c, 
and coffee-service on side-table. DISCOVERED HiG- 
DEN, surveying the disorder in dismay. 

HiGDEN. A 'unt dinner. If they'd a kep' it in the dining- 
'all, where it belongs, 'twouldn't a been so bad, but to bring 
the coffee and liquors in 'ere, an' scatter them all over the 
place, an' 'ats, an' whips. (Glares about her with folded 
arms) An' ev'ry man except Stubbs, a-gorgin' hisself below 
stairs, an' ev'ry 'ouse-maid at work on the dishes, an' the 
fiddlers 'ere by nine, an' the 'all to be cleared for dancin'. 
(Begins picking up the hats, and carries them in a pile 
outside D. R. c, then stands, arms akimbo, just outside the 
curtains. (Note. — In the scene which follows, Higden 
should be either at the door, or just outside, when she pauses 
for Stubbs' remarks) Not put 'em there? You can put 'em 
where you likes, Stubbs. (Gathers an armful of whips) An' 
the whips with 'em. An' if the gentlemen can't pick their 
own 'tain't my lookout. I 'as to clear the 'all for the dance. 
The same not bein' my work, as you well knows, Stubbs, but 
Bess, is 'elpin' with the dishes, an' if we 'adn't a door, I dare 
be bound you'd be a-guzzlin' with the rest of 'em. (Pause) 
Yes. I said guzzlin'. That's a man's way. (Pause) Yes, 
I said a mans way, Stubbs, an' I don't know what the Lord 
ever made such for. (Pause) For women! (She is gather- 
ing up glasses, decanters, etc., and carrying them outside the 
door while she talks) Well, if the Lord made men for wo- 
men, 'E made you to take these things in the dinin'-'all for 
me. (Pause) You'll do it willin'? Well now, that's 'an'- 
some o' you. Stubbs, an' if you'd take the coffee service, too, 
I wouldn't be so moithered. (Pause) You'll take anything 
I say an' me too? (Indignantly) An' me too! You can 
pass that sort o' joke with the under-'ouse-maids, Stubbs, 
but I'd 'ave you to know my Lady's own maid, ain't to be 
chaffed. (Pause) Sober earnest? I dare be bound you're 
neither of 'em, Stubbs, though I never 'eard as you took to 
drinkin' an' lyin' by nature. (Pause) Ask parson, if I say 
the word? I wouldn't a thought it o' you, Stubbs. (Pause. 
Yvonne comes to d. r. c, stands a moment, looking Ibach 



The Future I^ady Holland. 47 

and listening, then ENTERS, but remains in the doorway, 
expectantly) Yes, I know it's a tidy little 'ouse, a neater 
ain't to be 'ad in the village. (Pause) Near enough to be 
convenient for waitin' on my Lady after we're married? 
/ ain't said we're to be married. (Pause. Yvonne has begun 
to listen with an amused smile) Well — I'll think it over, 
Stubbs. (Pause) Two 'undered pound ready to make over 
to me the day we're married. I must say that's 'an'some o' 
you, Stubbs, an' not expected. (She has finished putting the 
room in order, and stands stiffly in the doorway as she talks. 
Yvonne is standing in the terrace door, evidently listening 
for someone outside) No, I won't promise to-night, Stubbs, 
but I'll think it over. An' Stubbs, you might as well 'ave 
the 'ouse ready against it's wanted. (ENTERS, and looks 
about the room to see if her work is finished) 

Yvonne (merrily). I thought you did not approve of men, 
Higden ? 

HiGDEN (sedately). You 'eard Stubbs, then. Miss Eevan? 

Yvonne (laughing). I heard you, Higden. I should have 
said Stubbs was wasting his breath if I hadn't heard you. 
What about Bessie? 

Higden (severely). It makes a mort o' difference. Miss 
Eevan, whether you're young and flighty, or old enough to 
know your own mind. They young people isn't fit to marry, 
they'll like as not, let a man 'ave 'is own way, which the 
same no man ought to 'ave, ever! 

Yvonne (gaily). Give my good wishes to Stubbs. I shall 
come and see how he takes to your way. 

Higden. Thank you, Miss, we'll be proud to see you. 

[EXIT L. 1 E. 

Yvonne (goes out on terrace D. L. c, returns, walks rest- 
lessly about the room, sits at the piano, and touches a chord 
or two, then starts up again and looks out terrace door). 
I do not understand. I sent him word. 

ENTER Higden l. 1 e. 

Higden. Mr. Lester sent this, Miss Eevan. 

Yvonne (taking note). Oh, where is Mr. Lester, Higden? 

Higden. In the billiard room. Miss. Some of the gentle- 
men's 'avin' a game. [EXIT l. 1 e. 

Yvonne. In the billiard room, I do not understand. 
(Opens note slowly. Reads) "After what I have just 
heard, I understand that your hours are no longer at my 
disposal. My congratulations. 

Holland." 



28 I'he Future I/ady Holland. 

What he has learned? What has he learned? And he drew 
a pen through " Lester," and signed it as he would a 
business note. What does he mean? (Excited) Is it my 
foolish talk with that perverse Monsieur Brent? (Looks at 
note again) "What I have just learned," "just learned" 
"Mv congratulations." (ENTER Diana d. l. c.) Diana, 
Diana. What has been said? You rmist tell me. 

Diana (laughing). Which? Things have been said all 
day long, a lot of things, by a lot of people. Anything gone 
wrong ? 

Yvonne. I do not know; I cannot understand; I had a 
note from your cousin, this morning. I did not tell you, 
Cherie, he was angry because I had talked all the evening 
with Monsieur Brent. (Takes it from her dress) This is it. 

Diana (sitting on couch, drawing Yvonne dotim heside 
her, and reading note). Oh! Hm! That would account 
for some things. (Frowns) Lester talks as though he had 
a lien on you, a sort of pre-emption claim, or something of 
that sort. Has he, Chick? 

Yvonne (shocked). Oh, Diana! And in his mother's 
house, and she not to know, how cotdd that be? 

Diana. Then he was taking a jolly deal for granted. 
Told him so, I hope? 

Yvonne (hesitating). Not exactly. I sent him a note, to 
say he would find me on the terrace. He did not come; and 
just now Higden brought me this. (Gives Diana second 
note) 

Diana (reading slowly). " After what I have just learned, 
I understand that your hours are no longer at my disposal." 
Hm! (Frowns) "My congratulations." Signed it first 
" Lester," then crossed that out and wrote " Holland." 
(Looks questioningly at Yvonne) Queer! Jolly queer! 
I'll ask Stacy what's up. I made a date with him here, 
about this time, he's sure to be on time. (Laughs) Noth 
ing dilatory about Stacy. (Jumps up and looks out on ter- 
race) Wonder who's driving off? Thought they were all to 
stay for the dance. (Steps out) Oh, is that you, Higden? 
A note for me? All right! (RE-ENTERS with note, ex- 
amining address) Stacy! What can he want to write 
about? Told him I'd be here. (Opens note) WHAT! 
(Stands silent, re-reading the note with a puzzled frown) 
If it's a fake, it's one I wouldn't have believed him guilty 
of. If it's not 



The Future I^ady Holland. zg 

^ Yvonne (coming over to her). Are there new complica- 
tions, Diana? 

Diana (emphatically). Complications! Listen to this: 
"I was stupid not to understand at once. Naturally, a peer 
in his own right, takes precedence of the younger son of 
another peer — and bankrupt to boot. Accept my felicita- 
tions. Stacy Brent." 

I am leaving on the 8.15. May I charge you with regrets to 
my host? (Sits suddenly on chair) Then that was he driv- 
ing off. (Jumps np and runs out on terrace, then returns) 
Stupid. As if I could stop him that way. He's at the 
park gates by this time. (Goes quicMy to telephone up R. 
and unhooks receiver) Halloo! Give me the stables. Yes 
— the stables quick. Halloo. Is that you, Saunders? I 
want you to saddle Vixen, and bring her round at once. 
Yes, it's Miss Di. Can't help it, Saunders. I must have 
her. Yes, you may come after if you like. The station 
road. Hurry now, that's a good fellow. (Hangs up re- 
ceiver) 

Yvonne (anxiously) . You're going to take Vixen out to- 
night, Cherie? 

Diana (briefly). Must. 

Yvonne. And ride in that gown? 

Diana. No time to change. Get me a coat, like a good 
girl, while I pin up these duds. (Gathers up train, and pins 
it around her recJdessly, while Yvonne runs out R. 1 e. and 
returns ivith darl- coat) 

Yvonne (helping her on with coat, and fastening it). But 
Cherie, what do you mean to do? 

Diana. Stop him, you dear little goose. Stop him at all 
hazards, and only Vixen can catch that 8.15 now. You 
don't think I'd let him go off with a bee like that in his 
bonnet. Kiss me quick. Chick, and don't worry. (Kisses 
her affectionately, and starts toivards D. L. c. Yvonne going 
with her) Lester has some kind of a bee in his bonnet, too; 
I'll settle him when I come back. So long, dearie. There's 
Vixen; I'm off. [EXIT both quicMy D. L. c. 

Yvonne (calling after her). Be careful, Diana. (RE- 
ENTERING) I am glad there is a moon. (As she RE- 
ENTERS, ENTER Lady H. l. u. e.) 

Lady H. (looking about). Really Higden has done well. 
Such a chaos as this was! (Crosses to fireplace and holds 
her hands to the blaze) The evenings are growing cool; I 
wouldn't mind a wrap. 



30 The Future I^ady Holland. 

Yvonne. Let tae get one, Aunt Sophia, you know I like to. 

Lady H. Very well. Higden is up to her eyes in work 
still. Just something soft and light, Higden will show you. 
(Yvonne runs out quickly l. u. e. and returns with wrap) 

Yvonne {adjusting wrap, turning chair toward fire, and 
"bringing footstool). Now you only need the coronet, my 
Aunt. {Gaily) 

Lady H. {tahing her seriously). The occasion did not 
warrant it, Yvonne. French etiquette might permit it, but 
we do not consider it good taste except on state occasions. 
{Warms her hands again, as she talks) Things have gone 
exceedingly well to-day. I shall sleep to-night with a quiet 
mind. Not that my mind is often perturbed, Yvonne. I 
hold it the duty of every Englishwoman to cultivate self- 
poise. But I am especially well content to-night. Every- 
thing has gone satisfactorily; and very largely, my dear 
child, I owe the culmination of my plans to your intelli- 
gent co-operation. (Yvonne has brought a low seat, and sits 
near her, looking into the fire. Lady H. pauses, and looks 
at her approvingly) 

Yvonne {hesitatingly). Yes, Aunt Sophia. 

Lady H. I am really very favorably impressed with young 
Brent, Yvonne. I had a long conversation with him after 
dinner. He happened to be sitting apart, and I joined him. 
I thought it well, Yvonne, with the thought of your future 
in my mind, as he seemed so much interested in you to 
know him a little better; and I found him very intelligent 
and sensible. Really remarkably intelligent. I told him all 
my plans for Lester and Diana. (Yvonne gives a little 
gasping cry) Did you say anything, Yvonne? 

Yvonne. Ko — oh, no; Aunt Sophia! 

Lady H. Oh, I thought you did. As I was saying, I 
told young Brent that Lester was to marry his cousin, and 
he immediately recognized the appropriateness of the ar- 
rangement; and asked me to personally present his con- 
gratulations to the new Lady Holland. He was so much 
interested, that I went more into detail than I otherwise 
should have done, and spoke of my natural desire to pro- 
tect Miss Holland from the fortune-hunters, who invar- 
iably besiege a girl of her wealth and station, by an early 
marriage, retiring myself as dowager, on her presentation 
at the next drawing-room. 

Yvonne {horrified). Oh, my Aunt! What did he say? 

Lady H. {looking at her a little puzzled). I am glad to 



The Future lyady Holland. 31 

see jou so much interested in him, my dear; but it is not 
necessary to be quite so vehement, it is very un-English. 

Yvonne. But v^hat covld he say! 

Lady H. He agreed vpith me entirely. He thought no 
wiser plan could have been suggested. (Smiling complac- 
ently) In fact, Yvonne, he was very complimentary on the 
subject of my discernment; and he spoke in no measured 
terms of the folly of pemiiless men who aspired to marry 
wealth. 

Yvonne {amhiguously') . Oh! 

Lady H. He is undoubtedly conscientious and high- 
minded; I am confident I have made no mistake, and that 
you may safely trust him with your estates. I approved 
so thoroughly of his views, that I told him it would give me 
pleasure to further any plans he might make for the future. 
(Pauses) I thought, with so good an opening, he might 
venture to confide his own hopes to me; but he was reticent. 
I liked him all the better for it; and Lester agreed with me 
that he would make a most suitable match for you. 

Yvonne (springing up). Lester? Agreed? (Stands lean' 
ing slightly forward waiting hreathlessly) 

Lady H. (tolerantly). Certainly, my dear. It is my in- 
variable custom, after m^y plans are well matured, to submit 
them to Lester. He is not merely a young man, you under- 
stand, he is the head of the House. By the way, where is the 
future Lady Holland? 

Yvonne. If you mean Diana. 

Lady H. (smiUfig complacently). Naturally I mean Diana. 
I am only the present. 

Yvonne (irho has gradually recovered herself). I sup- 
pose. Aunt, I suppose there could be no other? 

Lady H. (very stately). My dear, I never change my 
plans. 

Yvonne (demurely). Because, Aunt, Diana has gone to 
the station, after Mr. Brent. 

ENTEE Diana d. l. c. 

Diana. Have another go Chick, she has come back from 
the station with Mr. Brent. 

Lady H. (severely). Diana, your eccentricities are be- 
yond belief. For the future Lady Holland 

Diana (interrupting). The future Mrs. Brent, Aunt 
Sonhia, at your service. (Throws off coat, and unpins gown, 
Yvonne helping her, and straightening her train) 



3a The Future I^ady Holland. 

Lady H. (aghast). The future Mrs. 



Diana (in a tone of careful explanation). Brent — Aunt 
Sophia, Mrs. Stacy Brent, and not so very " future," either. 
We brought the dear old Bishop up from the train, his trap 
wasn't there, and he and Stacy hit it off between them, that 
there's no time like the present 

Lady H. (stonily). Am I to understand, Diana, that you 
propose marriage 

Diana (interrupting). You bet I didn't. It was Stacy. 
And then he and the Bishop fixed it up. 

Lady H. And the Bishop approves this extraordinary 
proceeding ? 

Diana. Sure go, aunt. He's known Stacy since he was 
a kid. 

Lady H. (going l.) I must see the Bishop. 

Diana. Don't believe you can just now. Aunt Sophia, 
they've gone to Lester's rooms for a little extra grooming, 
and if Lester has the sense he was born with, he'll follow 
Stacy's lead, and introduce Lady Holland at the same time. 

Lady H. (hewildered). Introduce Lady Holland? 

Diana. It isn't annoimced yet; but I'm in the confidence 
of both parties to the contract 

Yvonne (starting forward). Diana! 

Diana (laughing). Don't be worried. Chick, I'll do all 
the explaining. (To Lady H.) There's an understanding, 
only awaiting the approval of the present Lady Holland 

Lady H. (still more hewildered). The approval — of the 
present 

Diana (putting her arm about Yvonne, and leading her 
to Lady H.). Permit me to present the future Lady Holland! 

Yvonne (shyly). With your approval, dear Aunt? 

Higden (at door had-). The Bishop to see my Lady. 

CURTAIN. 




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